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Is Self-Sabotage Keeping You From Your Goals?

10/5/2020

 
This month I’ll be exploring what self-sabotage is, why we partake in it, and how to fight back against destructive behaviors and form healthy habits instead. This is a very important topic for me because, in my experience, self-sabotage is one of the main reasons (if not the only one) people do not succeed when working on becoming healthy or achieve a goal. ​
Behavior is said to be self-sabotaging when it creates problems and interferes with long-standing goals. The most 
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common self-sabotaging behaviors are procrastination, blaming others, self-medication with drugs or alcohol, comfort eating, and interpersonal conflict.
While these acts may seem useful and comforting at the moment, they ultimately undermine us, especially when we engage in them repeatedly. With anything the first step in change is to be aware of our behavior.
SO, ARE YOU SELF-SABOTAGING?
Can you relate to any of the following?
  • You tend to focus on what’s NOT working, as opposed to what is.
  • You tend to fear the future, worry a lot about the “what ifs” and what might happen down the road.
  • You feel like you have no value, and find it challenging to recall accomplishments.
  • You criticize yourself often and can’t accept compliments.
  • You often criticize or judge others.
  • You compare yourself to others, consistently, then feel bad for not measuring up.
  • You chase away relationships. If you are in a relationship, you quickly find flaws and faults in the other person.
  • You feel like you have no purpose in life.
  • Having a negative, pessimistic, or self-defeating mindset. For example, ‘I’m going to fail, I just know it.’
  • Over-eating
  • Under-eating
  • Forced incompetence – portraying yourself as unintelligence or incapable. Women are more likely to do this than men.
  • Bullying – includes actions and words to convince people to get your way or to agree with you (you are right they are they wrong attitude)
  • Self-harm
  • Self-pity
  • Drug and alcohol abuse
  • Deliberately alienating yourself from others or isolating yourself.
  • Refusing help
  • Spending too much money or spending, in general, to make you feel good.
  • Physical neglect – getting poor sleep, refusing to exercise, eating unhealthy foods, and failing to maintain basic hygiene are all signs of this.
  • Mental neglect – refusing, avoiding, or failing to confront psychological health issues (anxiety, depression, OCD, negativity)
We all go through ups and downs, but if you find yourself returning to patterns of binge drinking, over-eating, under-eating, self-harm, physical neglect, or any of the other items on this list, you likely find comfort in the harmful actions of self-sabotage.
Next week, I’ll talk about some of the reasons we engage in self-sabotage.
Remember, I'm always here to help if you have any questions email at ContactToni@drToniCamacho.com and click here to listen to this week's radio show for FREE (scroll down to see the show)
Until next week,
​Toni

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    Dr. Toni is a Best-selling author, Holistic Health Practitioner (HHP) & Registered Herbalist in San Diego, California. She holds a PhD in psychology, and a Clinical Herbalist Certificate, an HHP certificate and is a Certified Trainer in the Success Principles. In private practice as a HHP  she has been influenced by a variety of clinical modalities and orientations, and by the diverse life experiences of her clients. Toni’s approach to healing is holistic & transpersonal. In her work, she integrates the principles of Eastern and Western nutrition, herbololgy, energy medicine, Buddhist mindfulness and personal counseling to assist others in working through their physical or emotional blocks to attain optimal health.

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